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Writer
For the basics, I'm Aurea, most of the people around me call me Rea. I'm still a student, not just in school but also in life.
I'm someone who wants to write and savour the things in life and what I've learned in it.
I am already convinced that there is a God and that my life has a purpose.
I've been in the Philippines since I was born and soon enough, I'll travel the world
with the one I'm meant to be with.I am so thirsty for experience. I constantly kiss change for the better. |
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about this blog
This blog is to the memories I've treasured. This is to the people that kept me living and kept me intact with who I'm supposed to be. This is for my creator who planned my life.
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Design: doughnutcrazyIcon: Photobucket Do credit accordingly if you changed the icon. |
A New Heart
I would like to say sorry for not blogging in such a long time. I have a large story to tell.I never knew this would happen. I ended the year and a half relationship I had with the boy I wanted to be with forever and ever. Ever since I met him; I did a lot of things I never expect to do. I spent most of my time with him. You know the type of person you call whenever you get home after classes? The person you talk to in person for hours and hours. Yeah, he was my best friend. He was the closest opposite friend I had. As vulnerable as I was, I fell for him... Harder than I thought. He was so different from other guys; I couldn't help it. I told him everything about me as he told me everything about him too. With so much intimacy building up, I started to forget about my relationship with God. I started to become distant with God even if God always reached me. I started to sin with my emotions with him. My heart was a brat. Time after time, God would move and do something that would indicate that what we're doing is wrong. I still urged to continue our relationship even if it's forbidden on his side. We were weak. I was weak. It continued and continued and things got worse even if we were happy with our dates and stuff. The feeling was so strong. I know this sounds cheesy but my world revolved around him. The month of April came and everything started to change. I was beginning to get surprised but I thought it would pass away. I cried for a lot of days before I thought of breaking up with him. Analyzed everything we've been through and God suddenly gave me the strength to end what was putting my life in the wrong path. God softened my heart and gave me enough wisdom to be mature enough and to finish what needs to be finished. I ended it on my birthday; I ended our relationship on May 11. Funny, because I met him after his birthday which is March 2 and now I end ties with him on my birthday. The next days were my lonely days. I couldn't help but look back and shed a tear. I had so much dreams and plans with him. The words and the things I did just to make him smile and how he was so loyal to me. But it was wrong. Some questions may stir in your mind like did it hurt me? Where did I get the courage to break up with the guy who I spent a year with? Yes, it hurts more than anyone can think of. He comes at my house after classes all the time before and memories flashback when I think of it. Every place in this house has a memory of him, even the things too. God was my source of everything. I just had to accept the fact that it's too early and even if you love someone so much, if it's not God's will... God will stop it eventually. It can take years but eventually, God will remove the one in your life that hinders you in your life to glorify him. These past days I've been seeking for so much advices, looking for people who will ease the pain. I've been reviving myself. God is the only one I'll always come back to. He is my sole solution to every problem. He is everything I need. I feel so blessed with one of our youth leaders' advice to me. "You have so much to live for, Rea." he told me, "You are worth waiting for. Live your life. Let go." He told me. Those are one of the things that marked my heart and made me calm and still in the Lord. I just feel so blessed that I am guided and God always catches me. He always manages to pick me up at my worst state. He saves me from everything. Right now, I'm just moving on. All of me is for Jesus Christ. I am a new creation everyday. Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come. -2 Corinthians 5:17 |