I've been running away from you and I truly miss you. Everyday, I make you cry and frown but you always manage to forgive me when I ask you to. I feel so worthless yet you tell me I'm very special. You hear everything I say, even in my mind. And you can't deny it, my mind is filled with unholy thoughts. Thoughts that are against you but why? Why do you still love me like you do? I've been a spoiled, disobedient and selfish brat. But why do you accept me as I am and keep me as your treasure?

Sorry Lord, I can't contain it. I've been unfaithful to you yet you've always been there for me. Giving me what I need and want. But Lord, I feel so unworthy. I feel like a total junk whenever I think of your greatness. I miss being in your presence. I miss feeling your arms wrapped around me completely. I cannot function without you and I am worthless without you. Why have I grown cold? :( Oh Lord, revive me. Put in me the fire to serve you and glorify you. Give me the fire to persevere for YOU and you alone. Give me the patience to wait for the things I must wait for so that I won't be distracted. You know my weaknesses and strengths, Lord. Please use my strengths to overcome my weaknesses. I can't do this alone. You have to move in me. I want to serve you whole-heartedly. Give me a new start, Lord. Pull me closer to you, just like you always do. I honestly do not know how to start but I give to you my past, future and present. I cannot help but cry.

I need to renew my heart.